You said you've met Gaby Roslin
You've been shopping with Keith Chegwin
You've chewed the fat with Noel Edmonds on MSN
There ain't no one quite like him
Is this your claim to fame?
Hanging on tight to the Z-list train
I might've been impressed back in '93
But now that shit don't wash with me - it don't wash with me
Philip Schofield's number's on your mobile phone
You call him up and give his duck a bone
You played your cards right with Bruce Forsythe
Nice to see you, to see you nice
Is this your claim to fame?
Hanging on tight to the Z-list train
I might've been impressed back in '93
But now that shit don't wash with me - it don't wash with me
You struck it lucky with Barrymore
You showed Bob Hoskins it's good to talk
You had small talk with Heather Small
Knowing you and Shovel don't get on at all
Is this your claim to fame?
Hanging on tight to the Z-list train
I might've been impressed back in '93
But now that shit don't wash with me
Tell me this ain't your claim to fame?
Even the Z-list think you're insane
Tell me who was impressed back in '93
You know that shit didn't wash with me
Release notes:
All words by Bri Jnr. & Tico Jnr., all music by Tico Jnr.
Bri Jnr muses:
Of all the Z-list celebrities we name-checked on this barnstorming punk rocker, the only surviving ones as I write are Gaby Roslin, Noel Edmonds, Philip Schofield, Michael Barrymore, Heather Small and Shovel. The others who have since departed will eventually be paid tribute to when Tico and I get round to writing a series of follow-up songs to Dead For A Laugh (2007-2008). There will be an endless supply of tributes for us to pay!
Onto more serious matters: I still haven't received my eagerly anticipating invite to appear on an episode of Celebrity Squares. What does one need to do in order to guarantee an appearance? I've sold more than enough broken Hobnobs to get household names like Mr. Kipling quaking in their boots!
Tico Jnr. quips:
I think this lot of us a 'thank you', as they've had their careers rejuvenated and gotten a rewind. Fair enough, some have gone on to slightly different things (rest in peace), but we put them back on the map.
As always, I have carried Bri Jnr. on this ditty. Another thigh-slapper that I've let him have a free ride on.
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