I didn’t know what love was until I chanced upon you on a Google search
You pressed the right keys and you right-clicked your way to my heart
The first time we communicated you were auctioning off some blow up dolls
But due to the nature of the item you weren’t gonna post it
So I had to come and collect it
You emailed me your address and a suitable time
We got chatting on Windows Messenger and the sparks began to fly
When I came over to meet you I came over shy
We chat online all the time
But when we physically meet we have nothing to say
As we’ve said it all to each other online
We chat online all the time
But when we physically meet we have nothing to say
As we’ve said it all to each other online
When I got home I left you some positive feedback
And that was the end of another chapter in my life
But when I opened up the box I found a note with many compliments
You said to look up your profile with Google online
So when I found your Myspace profile
I requested for you to be a friend of mine
You gave me your approval and the sparks began to fly
I viewed your pictures and beat myself off every night
We chat online all the time
But when we physically meet we have nothing to say
As we’ve said it all to each other online
We chat online all the time
But when we physically meet we have nothing to say
As we’ve said it all to each other online
So you eventually moved in with me
But we still chat online in separate studies
That’s all we had together so the sparks eventually died
But I still view your pictures and beat myself off every night
We chat online all the time
But when we physically meet we have nothing to say
As we’ve said it all to each other online
We chat online all the time
But when we physically meet we have nothing to say
As we’ve said it all to each other online
We chat online, we chat online, we chat-chat-chattio, we chat online
We chat online all the time 24-7 in a 69
We chat online, we chat online, we chat-chat-chattio, we chat online
We chat online all the time 24-7 in a 69
I’ll be your Google canoodle online
Release notes:
All words & music by Bri Jnr. & Tico Jnr.
Bri, with a bit of mascara running down his face states:
This song is a modern classic for the ages - you know it, your grandmother knows it, Piers Morgan knows it and mysteriously reclusive John Deacon knows it.
In inescapable anthem, play-listed regularly on every radio station going from Smooth FM to Grindcore Gold. It topped the greatest song ever poll in Total Carp magazine just two months after its initial release, leaving the likes of 'Hey Judge', 'Earth Song', 'Waltzing Matilda' and 'Once I Caught A Fish Alive' languishing way behind in the remainder of the top 5.
Bob Dylan declared that his only regret in life was having not written this song himself. I think you get the general picture of success and acclaim here.
Of course, I wrote the majority of it and Tico has spent years of trying to outdo it - in fact, he may have finally struck gold with Wet Confetti, which as I write is the most requested song on Absolute Radio 90's. Congratulations chap.
I need never sell another broken biscuit again thanks to the fruits that 'Online' has brought me. But I need to do something with my hands in public.
As disgruntled looking Tico Jnr. chirps:
What utter drivel. Sure, Wet Confetti is better than this ditty, although you wouldn't believe Bri thinks so if you ever read the nasty written note left for my a few weeks ago, but it is not as magnificent as he thinks. Every lyric I mentioned was pooh-poohed (for example, I wanted to Ask Jeeves rather than Google), and I had to threaten to cry if my guitar solos weren't included. He didn't want the majesty of the / his main riff to be lost amongst all my noodling. Thankfully I got my way and managed to give this number a bit of 'je ne sais quoi'.
To set a couple of matters straight, I was out on a fun-run with Bob just yesterday, and he said he has NO regrets. Morgan 'the church Organ' has also twitterered in recent weeks to refute the earlier claim. Disappointing, Bri. Disappointing.
Back - Nice And Inoffensive
|
Next - After Your Hearts And Wallets