Turn out the lights and light the candles
Give me a minute to unbuckle my sandals
We’ll put on some soft rock by The Bangles
Let’s ride this bed and see how it handles
And oh-by the way I forgot to mention
Before you hoist yourself onto my erection
I’ll slip on a condom for max protection
I don’t want to give you my infection
You’ve got the whip, I’ve got the cream
And when I whip it out you’re gonna scream
‘Cause I’m well endowed indeed
I’ll make your G-Spot bleed
I’m determined to succeed and you’re determined to suck cock
Because I can’t sleep without you in my bunk bed giving me head
Compared to us other lovers fail
Our romps register on the Richter scale
I’ll push and prod, you’ll squeal and wail
If sex was illegal we’d spend life in jail
And oh-by the way I forgot to mention
You’re sweet sixteen and I’m drawing my pension
I feel really glum when you’re in detention
I have to sit and wait in the school reception
You’ve got pigtails, I’ve got false teeth
And if your parents find out they’ll give me grief
‘Cause I’m well endowed indeed
I’ll make your G-Spot bleed
I’m determined to succeed and you’re determined to suck cock
Because I can’t sleep without you in my bunk bed giving me head
I’m well endowed indeed
I’ll make your G-Spot bleed
I’m determined to succeed and you’re determined to suck my cock
I’m well endowed indeed
I’ll make your G-Spot bleed
I’m determined to succeed and you’re determined to suck my cock
Because I can’t sleep without you in my bunk bed giving me head
Release notes:
All words & music by Bri Jnr. & Tico Jnr.
A Tico Jnr. kindly states:
What a story. What a melody. What an everything really. The number in it's purest form is gushing, but then stick my creepy inspired guitar and you've got an anthem suitable for most 1990's and beyond cassette compilations.
We were really on form with this, and I do doth my hat to Bri for partially inventing the start of the banger. I took his little seedling and very much turned it into something well endowed. Indeed.
Keep a watchful eye out for the small 12" edition, to be released somewhere. Somehow.
Bri Jnr. stutters:
We've composed a number of dittys that are not for the fainthearted and this is most certainly one of them. A number 1 adult contemporary hit in Germany which has been translated into 69 different languages, despite or perhaps because of it's unconventional and decidedly vulgar love story.
The Bangles career was instantly revived and bunk bed sales skyrocketed following the runaway success of this anthemic power ballad. I heard a rumour that Mick Jagger thought that this song was about him. He is so vain that he probably does think this song is about him and his appetite for women more than half his age. But no, the characters and events contained within are purely fictional...ok, not purely as there is absolutely nothing pure going on here.
Tico's contribution here is minimal but delightful- his guitar cries through each chorus and has me genuinely concerned for his wellbeing until I remember that it is I, Bri, who is the sensitive member of Space Brain, therefore Tico should be worried about MY wellbeing. He has far more productive things to be doing though to be fair.
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